Please note: I wrote this blog entry on Sept. 15th and never posted it – though I did reference it, thinking that I had and that some of you had read it! This has nothing to do with my age and everything to do with being an Aquarius!
One of the followers of my blog has asked that I write about the oneness of subject and object….I can only share what I have come to know through my own experience.
If I define myself as the subject (the one having the experience) and you as the object (the person I am experiencing), I am already creating separation. To even think about this or to feel this, I go to personal experience. When I first felt this “oneness of all that is,” Life presented me with many opportunities to feel it physically, mentally, and emotionally – all of which are a part of my spirituality.
I recently wrote of standing inside a redwood tree and knowing I was the tree and it was me. Check out that blog, yes?
I also wrote of a more intense personal experience which was the attack on 9/11. On that day I taught 3 yoga classes and chose not to watch or listen to the news once I heard the initial reports. I had to remain calm and be able to guide my students through the emotional trauma they were experiencing. Upon arriving home that night, I watched the 10 o’clock news. I stood frozen as I watched the destruction and felt the horror of what had happened. My body convulsed and I ran into the bathroom where I vomited violently. I returned to the living room, turned off the television, and have never watched any replay of that day again.
I was shaken to the core. Anger arose, as did confusion, profound sadness, and fear of what might come next. As the next day’s unfolded I hoped for news of friends living in New York and, though they were okay, I grieved for those who weren’t. I prayed for rescue workers, knowing their health would be affected in the years to come. I puzzled over the ability of one human being to do this to another. I carried images in my head and heart of mothers in foreign lands knowing their sons had done this – were they proud or horrified?
The anger dissipated quickly and a few questions remained: What brings you to hate your brothers, sisters, parents, children, friends so much that you could do this? Don’t you know you have done this to yourself? You are us. Don’t you know that when you hate “us” you are hating yourself?
Putting this into words is a challenge because it isn’t about words. It is about the truth between and under the words. When a wave rises from the sea and takes on its own personality, it is still the sea. The sea is the wave and the wave is the sea. Every time I judge and reject you, I judge and reject a part of myself and vice verse. Every time I feel your judgement of me, I know I have judged another myself. If I can feel I am the redwood tree, I must also allow myself to feel that I am you. We are the two sides of the human coin….one is the head and one is the tail but both are the coin.
This is a lot of words! See what I mean?! Read it. Feel it. Let it go and discover Truth within. When you get it, truly get it, you will know what I am trying to say. The knowing is enough and way better than the words.
Peace. Love. All Ways.